Sisters-in-Service
Are you a women veteran who feels unseen and unheard? Do you struggle with finding your purpose after service? Sisters-in-Service is a podcast that gives women veterans the platform to talk about those exact issues and more. Hear from other veterans, military spouses and Veteran Service Organizations (VSO) just like you that have overcome their transition from the military. Every Tuesday this podcast encourages women veterans to stand up and be counted because as a group we have a voice. From your host - Cat Corchado - The Voice Connecting Women Veterans
Sisters-in-Service
A Path to Fulfillment: Malaysia Harrell on Intuition and Empowerment
Discover the transformative journey of Malaysia Harrell, a spiritual transformation coach and Air Force veteran, as she shares her path from military service to guiding women in unlocking their true potential. Ever wondered how your upbringing and early influences shape your life's decisions? Malaysia's story begins with her experiences in junior ROTC and family ties to the military, leading her to join the Air Force post-9/11. Learn how she transitioned from being a clinical social worker and psychotherapist to a full-time transformation coach, helping individuals navigate societal pressures to find deeper purpose and fulfillment.
Female veterans face unique challenges, and Malaysia's insights highlight the struggles of recognition and understanding within and outside the military community. She brings to light the often overlooked feelings of isolation and discomfort women veterans experience, emphasizing the healing power of connecting with fellow female veterans. Malaysia also delves into the role of spiritual wisdom and intuitive guidance in overcoming trauma and realizing one's life's vision, underscoring how these personal gifts can be pivotal in the healing process.
Finally, Malaysia opens up about her personal battles with severe health issues during her military career and how these experiences ignited her passion for self-advocacy and holistic wellness. Her story of resilience and transformation is a powerful reminder of the importance of reclaiming personal power in healing. Through embracing authenticity and reconnecting with childhood passions, Malaysia encourages listeners to align with their true selves amidst life's roles and expectations. Tune in to be inspired by her empowering journey and gain valuable insights on living a fulfilling and authentic life.
Welcome to Sisters in Service podcast. Most of you know me as a strong advocate for women veterans in being recognized not only as veterans but also as women who are changing the world through our passion of serving even after service. This podcast is my passion by telling all the stories of military brats, military spouses, active duty and veterans, not to forget the veteran service organizations that help us along our transition journey. I want to thank you in advance for listening. I hope that you will join me. Every week, a new podcast and episode comes out every Tuesday, so I hope that you will join and I hope that you enjoy. This podcast is brought to you by Small Space Pilates. Are you ready to get fit and fabulous from the comfort of your own home? Look no further than Small Space Pilates. With live online Pilates and strength training classes, a video library and a-allowed policy, you can achieve your fitness goals without ever leaving your house. Click on the link for your complimentary week and start your journey to feeling fabulous today.
Speaker 1:Welcome everyone to our latest episode of Sisters in Service podcast. You know me, I am the host, kat Corchado, and today I am thrilled to introduce a truly remarkable guest, malaysia Harrell. Malaysia is not only a spiritual transformation coach and, yes, we are going to talk about that, but she's also an Air Force veteran. She's also a keynote speaker and author who is dedicated to guiding women towards a life of freedom and fulfillment. Malaysia welcome to the Sisters in Service. Podcast.
Speaker 2:Thank you, Kat. Thank you so much for having me. I'm so honored to be here today.
Speaker 1:Well, it's awesome for you to be here and I'm glad you said yes, and I wanted to start off, like I start off whenever I talk to veterans. Did you pick the Air Force, or did the Air Force pick you?
Speaker 2:Well, that's an interesting question because I, from a young age, had a life of service in many different capacities in my community, a life of service in many different capacities in my community. And when I went to high school, you know, of course, I had to decide what I wanted to do with my life. And you know, at that time I had a chance to join the junior ROTC for the Air Force program and I loved it. I did three years in high school and our commander rest his soul, god rest his soul, chief Master Sergeant Henry Palmer he just really was so supportive and he actually wanted me to go to the Air Force Academy, me and another student of color. And so I remember him. Yes, it was, it was so it was intimidating. Honestly, I gotta be honest with you, of course it is.
Speaker 2:So when the gentleman came to recruit us, you know he spoke with us and at that time, you know, I was working two jobs in high school and ROTC. I had such my life was so busy at a very young age and I decided not to go into the military at that time. And so the story is I mean I did one year of Army ROTC and one year of Air Force ROTC in college, but it wasn't until 9-11, 2001 happened and I was in my master's program for clinical social work and I'll never forget it. I was at the Baltimore Public Defender's office at my residency program or my internship program, and that day, Kat, I said I'm going into the Air Force, like I just knew it and so I don't know.
Speaker 1:I think it kind of you picked the Air Force. You picked the Air Force. You know well, usually when I'll give you an example of it of you know when I say, did you pick the Air Force or do the Air Force pick you? Sometimes you might have gone to the Army recruiter and the Army recruiter wasn't there and the Air Force recruiter said, psst, come here. And then you go into the Air Force. I did pick the Air Force because it's something that I was familiar with, because I was born into the Air Force when my dad was in, and it was just something that I was familiar with, because I was born in the force where my dad was in and it was just something that I was familiar with.
Speaker 2:So thank you.
Speaker 1:Yeah, thank you for answering that question. So now let's get into a little bit about what you do. So you call yourself a transformation coach. What does that mean?
Speaker 2:So I recently just transitioned into that full time. I was a, you know, board certified clinical social worker, psychotherapist, been doing that for over 30, almost 30 years and you know there were things that happened I'm sure we'll talk about that that led me to doing this. But it's really someone who is you, you know, helping to guide other people to find their purpose in life, basically. And so what a lot of the clients that work with me, so what a lot of the clients that work with me. You know they are very successful in life, but it's success that's determined by society.
Speaker 2:You know society's values and goals and there there's something that's missing inside. They feel empty and they're like, ok, I know, there's something more for me. And sometimes they've gotten, they've received those intuitive nudges to say, hey, there's something else that I need you to do. And they just are not. Either, you know, they don't have clarity in order to move forward or they're not necessarily in a position to hear those messages. And so I help to give them clarity, to guide them on that path to reaching soul fulfillment. You know, of course, you know I also, you know, have a business Blissful Life Consulting so we offer holistic wellness solutions I've had all these years to really get into more of a holistic perspective when looking forward to, you know, either transforming or, you know, just making a pivot in life.
Speaker 1:I think sometimes, as we get older, we get into the, like you said, we're successful according to society you know, it's a nine to five job and you're making that six figure income, but you're not happy and sometimes we get into this imposter syndrome, and so I think we kind of both deal a little bit with women who are in this midlife, who the last of their kids are either grown or they're in college. They have the empty nest syndrome. And then, for me and being in fitness, they look in the mirror and they go who the hell is that? Looking back at me? Because in our brain we still were like, yeah, this, I'm that.
Speaker 1:And then you look in the mirror and you go, I'm sorry, who's that person? And then you look in the mirror and you go I'm sorry, who's that person? Right, and we get stuck. And so I like to tell women that you know, remember when you were younger and you had all these things, I'm going to do this, I'm going to do this, I'm going to go here, I'm going to travel here, and then your life takes a different path, which is fine, and you take all of those wants and things and you stuff them away somewhere.
Speaker 1:So I like to say it's behind a closed door but I also like to tell women that the door's closed, it's not locked.
Speaker 1:Open the door Now, some of that stuff. You know, oh, I want to hike a mountain. Okay, maybe that's not in your repertoire right now, but there might be something that you forgot where you think, oh, I forgot about this. So I love how you kind of take the mental and the physical together, because they do go together. I'm going to tell you, physical work helps your mental work, your mental capacity, and so I just think it's very important for people to understand, especially now that we all go through this. It's not just you, although it feels that way, you know that. It's not just you, and and I'm I'm sure you already tell people.
Speaker 2:No, but I mean we all need. I think what you were saying is true about the imposter syndrome and we're all professionals, we've served our country, but we need a reminder. We still need a reminder, like everybody needs a reminder, and I think you know, especially for veteran women, I feel like our voices are not always heard. So sometimes it's like are we even listening to our own voices and our inner calling?
Speaker 1:Not necessarily because we're so used to taking care of everyone else or even having a mission, and sometimes you know you get the mission done and then you get out of the military and it's this, you know it's transition, but it feels weird, it feels different, and you think I must be the only one dealing with this, because when I got out, no one talked about it. That's right, no one talked about transition. Every now and then, some guy who would, you know it was usually a guy who had retired or left the military would come back on base and you know, hey, and I'm thinking, what are you doing here? And um, because no one talked, he missed the people he was in the military with. But again, people don't talk about that.
Speaker 1:So I think the transition is I won't say it's harder for women, I say it's different for women because we get out of the military. If you still have kids, you're trying to find a job, you're trying to find schools, you're trying to find childcare If they're young enough, you're trying to do all these things. And when you lift your head out of the water for a second and it's been a year you go where's my tribe, where are my women veterans? And that's where the loneliness comes in. So do you? We're actually co-hosting a women's veteran mobile spa and so.
Speaker 1:I get to go, yes, please.
Speaker 2:And also with the retreats, the healing retreats, it's the same thing. So a lot of veteran women get an opportunity to just, you know, have a safe space or even just to feel good.
Speaker 1:You know, when you say spa, I think of all the spa things, because we don't take that time and sometimes we don't feel like we deserve it. You know, to get a massage, to get a facial, to get our nails done, to get our hair done to, to do all of those things, because you know I do it to help me feel good. I feel good when my nails are done, I feel good when my hair is done, and so sometimes women don't take that time and sometimes they can't. You know they've there's their schedule so jam packed. Um, when you deal with women veterans, what is the number one thing that you hear constantly from women veterans?
Speaker 2:Hmm, the number one.
Speaker 1:I or I want it like top three, the top out of the top three. Things over there.
Speaker 2:Again, not not being heard. You know you're coming from a or you're in a male dominated organization and it's a lot to have to prove yourself, you know, as worthy as your counterparts and so I think you know that's one of the things is being heard. And even after my own experiences, I've had multiple people come to me and say, you know, number one, they didn't feel comfortable asking for help. That was another big thing. I've met several people who told me they were homeless after they got out of the service, which we all know that. You know, homelessness, suicide rates are still very high for veterans. But you know, to have them come to me and say this is what I'm dealing with and they're very uncomfortable. Number one they don't feel like their voice is heard, so they don't feel comfortable even asking for help.
Speaker 1:I think that's important, what you just said, because when you're dealing with civilians yes, I still call y'all civilians Anyone who's not military related. I don't call them people, I call them civilians. They don't understand, and when it comes from a woman, they don't know what to ask. They don't know, they're not going to get it. Bless their heart, they try, they'll say thank you for your service and then they go on. But I think it's important for women, before they get out of the military, or even after you've been out of the military, get connected with other women veterans. And I think that's so important because I went through this isolation phase. We, we moved to a place where there weren't any veterans other than my husband, and you just kind of keep it inside and finally you kind of go wait, why am I doing this? And 9-11 was what made me think about that. And I was going into I don't know if I told you this my husband and I are going into a supermarket during some time after nine 11, people were selling these little little flags that you could put on your car, and so I walked by and the guy says would you like to buy a flag? And I go no, thank you and he said what have you done for your country? And I said I did 20 years for my country and so he never. You know, I find that, men, even if he's faking it, you know he wants to be a veteran. He's not a veteran If he wears all the things people assume he's a veteran, whereas for women veterans we have to prove oh, when did you serve, where did you serve, how long were you in? And if you weren't in any kind of conflict conflict which I wasn't, I was a, I was in the military peacetime they're like well, how are you a veteran? You didn't fight anywhere and I'm like I supported, that's right, whatever was going on. So it's hard to speak about it, but I've gotten to an age where how can I say this nicely, I don don't care anymore, that's right. So you know, it's just.
Speaker 1:People say, oh, you know, my husband and I will walk into somewhere and somebody will say, oh, you're a veteran, blah, blah, blah. No, my husband will say, oh, we are retired military, and we are. And so they have all these questions and comments for my husband and, bless his heart, he'll go, she's the retiree, and he's. And they're like oh, thank you for your service and they keep it moving. I'm like, why couldn't you have asked me those questions? That's right, because as veterans, we love to talk about our service, but we're not just going to bull all over you about it, you about it, and especially women. So I think we have a long, long way to go in getting women discovered, military veterans discovered.
Speaker 1:You know, when there's a military, any kind of event, any kind of military holiday, I always watch TV. I look at the ads and they're like oh you know, veterans Day, you know. And I'm like where's the woman, where's she at? And they're like, oh, you know, veterans Day, you know. And I'm like, where's the woman, where's she at? And you don't see her. No, so the only people that they know as a female veteran is GI Jane, you know, poor Demi Moore, that's the only they're like oh you don't look like a veteran, and that doesn't.
Speaker 1:That doesn't add. I mean, that's just that's deflating to all of us. That doesn't add. I mean that's just that's deflating to all of us.
Speaker 2:So, when you are working with women because you help them in overcoming past traumas, healing deep-seated hurts and even crafting a clear vision, and you use what's called a combination of spiritual wisdom and intuitive guidance. Can you explain that for our audience? Sure, well, you know, and everyone should know, that we all have spiritual gifts, that we've been given, and the Bible even talks about that. But when we're in, when we've experienced high levels of stress, when we've experienced high levels of trauma, it's very difficult to hone in on those spiritual gifts Absolutely. And so, with honing in on that, no one can give you the vision that God has for you in your life. Only you can get that message, no one else. So people can, I can guide you, I can support you, but it's really getting in tune to who you truly are as a person. Looking at your core values, we think about everybody else's the air forces, the other services, sister services, core values, but just getting more in tune with that inner working, that inner vision of yourself. So who?
Speaker 1:are you? Yeah, who are you getting yeah?
Speaker 2:Yeah, getting you to uh uh, having an opportunity in a safe space to figure that out for yourself, because that's really the only way that you're going to have that soul fulfillment. It's not going to be what someone else told you to do, or you looking on social media and seeing what someone else is doing.
Speaker 1:It's not there. I'm going to go out on a limb. It's not there.
Speaker 2:So just helping people to really dive deep and to figure out who they truly are and what, what those spiritual nudges and messages that they're getting for themselves, and and having the permission to to follow them, because sometimes when you do things that are different, that people don't realize that you know. They know you as someone else, right, but it's not. You've been giving yourself and serving and giving up yourself for everybody else. Like you said, that empty nest or someone who's been doing everything for everybody. So giving yourself permission to be obedient to those nudges as well.
Speaker 1:I think it's important to also follow your gut instinct, and so my question is how hard is it in your position to have all of these things going on in your head? You know the things you want to do, the things you're supposed to do. How is your gut instinct? Kind of, you can't hear it because of all this noise that's up here, correct?
Speaker 2:That's correct. Now, sometimes you know you're going to feel uncomfortable, so you'll know that there's something that needs to change or some sort of shift you need to make. But you may not have clarity on how to get there or what is supposed to be. And you're absolutely right. When you have so many things going on, and even what we were talking about, all the things that you put in a closet, that you didn't you know that you've been putting off. You know you, you're not able to even open that door because you're so overwhelmed with what you have. And when we're looking at where to start, I just say start taking everything away. You know to start. I just say start taking everything away. You know you, you're doing so many different things. What things can you pawn off on someone else? What things are absolutely necessary that you need to do? Because it's it's time to really just focus on you. Right now, you're focused on everybody else, but let's carve out some time to really look at what are some of the things that you want to look at for yourself.
Speaker 1:I think it's hard to when family members you know are telling you oh well, don't do that.
Speaker 2:That just doesn't sound like you, or it doesn't, you know, or oh well, why do you want to do that?
Speaker 1:That's not going to make you the money you need, or you? Know and so that all of that on top of it, you're just like, okay, well, maybe they're right, and you kind of give in and I I was like that. I used to give in, and then I got to a point where I give in for a little while and then I'm like, oh no, I'm doing this Cause my gut keeps saying why aren't you doing this, why aren't you doing this, why aren't you?
Speaker 2:And you finally get tired of hearing your gut instincts saying fine, I'll do it. You're going to keep getting that bang over the head. Something's going to keep happening, or you know? One other thing that I find with clients is that you know, you notice that when you go from one's job to the next, you experience the same thing with the next supervisor. Or you're going from one relationship to another relationship, You're having similar issues. It's almost like you're on a hamster wheel, you know, and it keeps going by and you think you're making progress and you think you're moving, but you're just avoiding. You're really going nowhere.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you're going nowhere. Yeah, exactly. And sometimes when a door closes, another door opens. What I mean by that is I was a communications project manager, right? Project manager? Hello, I should be able to get a job right, and you get nothing. And it's deflating, it's very just wait what I just did 20 years of this, what you don't want someone with 20 years experience. But what I was able to do was give it into fitness, because that's what I'd been doing part-time while I was in the military. I said, well, let me see if this works. And that was the journey onto what I'm doing now. So it's, it's hard, you know, to have a door closed in your face, but there's also an opportunity to say can I do my own thing, can I do my own thing part time? So I'm making money here, and then tell my boss to whatever you'd like to tell your boss.
Speaker 1:That's right or not, or not have a boss right or not, or your boss is you. You know that's the opportunity, exactly so I wanted to talk a little bit. I was reading through your bio and it said you had overcome some childhood trauma and life-threatening illnesses, and how does that play into what you're doing today?
Speaker 2:That's a really good question Because, you know, when you think about retirement, you think about all the possibilities and you don't know. You know what you want to do and then you think about, like you said, as a child, what were some of those things you thought about when you were going through whatever you were going through. And so, yeah, I experienced a lot of, you know, different things, growing up, a very tumultuous childhood. I was forced to grow up early and I think that's what gave me the skill set to, or the skills, you know, the leadership traits to be successful in the military, you know, and to be able to perform at a high level because of, you know, my past experience in childhood trauma. And then you know I'm doing very well in my career, very successful. And then, you know, very successful. And then you know I had made it to captain, which is a 06 Navy rank, and I so that was 2019. And I was at the height of my career. I had gotten married in 2016 to a veteran army veteran, you know, and it was just we were doing really good and bought the home of our dreams and just all the things. And in 2019, I actually, when I got promoted, I started, I had that empty feeling that I was telling you about. It was like, oh, I made it, but what's next? I spent my whole career. This was my goal, and I have realized, because I remember the day I got promoted, I had this nudge to call my grandmother who raised me, and she wasn't there. She had passed in 2016, the year that I got married, and I was like, oh, she was my biggest cheerleader, my dad's my biggest cheerleader too, but it was just she raised me and that was the person who I immediately thought to call.
Speaker 2:Well, in 2020, I got deployed at the height of COVID, and so I was deployed to the Navajo nation, to the most desolate area, and I came home with a septic hip and I got hospitalized at Walter Reed and they couldn't find what was going on with me. You know this was one of the premier hospital, military hospitals for the medical system, and after four days, they said Captain Harrell, we can't find anything, we're going to send you home today. Now, at this point, I had been to the ER several times. I was on the highest level meds. They had me on a, a dilaudid and they had me on a drip, and I remember pressing the button for every time, you know, for I needed it Right. Even when I took it, it didn't even suppress the pain at all Like that. So I knew I was transitioning, you know, I knew I was going to pass away and I didn't express that to anyone, but I had. I was making amends with God. You know I was sending people texts, um, you know there were people who were coming to visit me in the hospital and so for them to say, you know, we're going to send you home, I mean, it was that was on top of the trauma of the deployment itself.
Speaker 2:It was almost like you know, forget it, you serve, your time is up. And that's what I thought. I thought my time was up, literally, and so I did. I didn't have the energy to advocate, but I did. You know, I didn't have the opportunity to be a patient and what I said was you know, you can euthanize me, because you wouldn't be able to deal with this pain. No one could deal with this pain. And so what happened was they took a sample out of my hip Once I said that, and they actually sent in a psychiatrist.
Speaker 2:You know, they thought maybe it was a somatic symptom. I don't know how anybody could even believe that that pain was in my head, because it was the most excruciating pain that you would ever imagine in your life, like when it's time to go. It was like time to go. I was, I was waiting, and so that that's what catapulted me into really wanting to do the holistic. Wellness is because number one, I wanted to make it accessible to everyone, because we may think we have accessibility to healthcare, but how accessible is it? You know how long does it take to get seen by a provider? How long does it take for them to actually listen to you?
Speaker 1:15 minutes, apparently. Well, longer to believe you. 15 minutes as a visit. Longer if they want to believe you. Minutes as a visit.
Speaker 2:Longer if they want to believe you. So what my premise is now is, of course, making holistic wellness accessible to all, but also giving you back your power to take control over your health. They are your physicians, your providers. They are not going to heal. You Can treat the symptom, but they are not here to heal. That is not what their job is. They're going to give you meds. They're going to send you, they're going to give you maybe, a referral. It may take 60 days to get in. By that time, your symptoms have worsened.
Speaker 1:They just pass you off to the next thing, yes.
Speaker 2:So what is your? What is the opportunity for you to take hold of your own health and responsibility for your own health, to help work in collaboration with the medical team to heal yourself? And that's what I had to do on my own, because I was 254 pounds. I was on um, uh, you know the high. I was on high doses of prednisone. That's going to swell up Cause I developed all these other medical ailments.
Speaker 2:You know, as a result of every cause. I had three, three large surgeries on my hip back to back, and then I ended up having nine surgeries over the past four years. And so what I'm saying is your body goes into shock and it's like, oh no, we can't do this. So you have all these other problems. And so what I'm saying is I was able to do that without working out. I couldn't work out the hip pain. I still have severe, severe back pain. You know, after all the hip surgery, I was going to ask you about that, because I was like your hips and your low back are so well connected.
Speaker 1:Yeah, absolutely. That's. That's unbelievable. I think that doctors hate me because I'm that person to ask all those questions. Why this, you know? Why can't I do this? What about this? You know? And I had a doctor tell me one time I guess he got tired, he goes, you know what, you're just getting older. And I said, wow, that's what they do say they pay you to say that to patients. And he just left the room. I was like, okay, I'm done, like I don't even have a primary care. You know why? Because I don't go to the doctor, I just don't.
Speaker 1:So I think, for women to advocate for yourself, we're so used to backing down and I'm going to use something really simple. You know, you go to the store and you get what's the word Inspired? You see a color that you've never worn. You put it on, it fits great, it looks great. You take it home and your family and or husband goes why'd you buy that color? Yeah, and then you will either oh well, I could take it back and I can get another color, or I picked that color because that's the color I wanted. That's right, period, that's right, and so I think it's, it's, that's a learning curve in in helping you to advocate, but to help you speak up in other situations. When you start small like that, you're like whew, that felt good. Yes, I was trying on something else and on something else.
Speaker 2:we got to put it in every area of our life Exactly and listening to that gut instinct.
Speaker 1:You know, I think I've had a very strong gut instinct since I was a child. For a few years I kind of ignored it and my life choices reflected that I'm just going to say. And now I listen to my gut instinct all the time. So I know that you're just not a coach, you're a champion for women and you also help women who trade in their pursuit of perfection. We feel sometimes we've got to be perfect. Whether it's starting a business, got to be perfect from day one, whether it's starting a podcast, we're starting anything. And I think as we get to be adults, especially when we get older, midlife and older, we have to learn how to be a beginner again. Yes, and that's okay. Okay, you know, I relearned how to roller skate. I bought myself a pair of roller skates. I said I'm roller skating. That is so awesome. Am I good at it? No, I suck. But you know what? I get such joy out of it. It doesn't matter how good I look, or I've got all the goofy pads on and the helmet, I don't care. Yes, but I'm having a great time all by myself because it's it's just, it's it's fun, and I think that we have to.
Speaker 1:As we get older, we forget about the things that bring us joy and bring us fun. And joy can be something as simple. As you know, I I walked my dog and and I saw a hummingbird the other day and I just watched it, you know. And when I'm out walking I'm not like, come on, brady. You know, let's get, let's go. You know it's. What do I see, what do I hear, what do I smell? And what's the other one? Well, not really taste. I can't be out tasting anything while I'm out there. But, you know, feeling the wind on my face If there is a wind, what do I see? That's beautiful. The wind on my face if there is a wind, what do I see? That's beautiful. Do I feel the wind on my skin? You know? Is there a cool wind? You know, what does the heat feel like on my skin? And I just think that we forget about these little things that can bring us joy. Sitting in the chair with my dog while he's sleeping brings me such peace, wow yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and I think that that's important. Is that something that you? I'm sure you do? But you know teaching women that it doesn't cost any money and it doesn't, it doesn't take a lot of time to just take a minute and breathe, how about that? How about just breathing correctly? You know getting that nervous system to kind of just Ooh, let's, let's power down a little bit. You know, absolutely, when I come into, if I was one of your new clients. So I come in, I contact you and we're talking take me through kind of a general walkthrough of how you approach each individual person. Like we walk in, I probably fill out something, I'm sure, and then do you sit down and just have a chat. How does that work? Can you walk our audience through that?
Speaker 2:Yeah, so everybody is different and so with coaching, you know, when you're doing mental health, you have a strict, a more precise protocol, right for standard of care. But for coaching, and especially when you're looking at spiritual transformation coaching, it can be a little bit different. So of course I do have an assessment. You know a conversation. People do fill out paperwork before they even meet with me, but the way we go depends on that individual person. So I think each person is more tailored depending on what they need.
Speaker 2:Because, honestly, you know we definitely develop a plan, you know an action plan, but some people require additional services, you know that are that would work in collaboration with the coaching, and so we'd establish that up front. If you need, if someone needs counseling, you know more therapy as well, you can get that as well. Right, and sometimes you know people are waiting, because you know sometimes the wait times are really high, right, but depending on what that person needs, I also have, you know, resources and referrals for different programs as well, especially if you're a veteran. So I have those resources available and we work towards what your goals are. They're not what my goals or anyone else's goals are, what your goals are, and we work and develop a plan to meet those goals.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I like that. So there's no one size fits all is what I hear you saying. It's very individual. Now, if someone needs other services, is it in conjunction with what you're doing with them now or is it something that they get that and then they come to you? It's probably dependent on the person. Also, it depends.
Speaker 2:It definitely depends on the person and then I'll determine, you know, based on what programs I have available, which ones they would go in or if they would stick with you know one-on-one coaching as well, but yeah, it depends If someone is more in a crisis, you know mode then they're not going to be in tune with you know any spiritual or getting deep or getting clarity. We need to make sure you have the resources that you need. So we make that determination and go from there.
Speaker 1:Okay. One last question. You emphasize authenticity and living fully. Can you explain? You know people think, oh, I'm being authentic and I'm like I'm not sure what that means. I mean being you and everything you bring. You know I call it special sauce. So in being who you are and in your business, is it hard for you to be authentic because you have to have your head on as someone who is listening to this person, or do people see the authenticity coming through?
Speaker 2:Well, that's a really good question, because I think every human has many different layers to them and so sometimes we have to be this version of ourselves. Sometimes we have to be this version of ourselves Are you the mom, are you the veteran? Are you the spouse? Are you the spouse? Are you the patient? You know, in each different aspect we sometimes we have to finagle and kind of adapt to that particular environment. But what being authentic is is more so being the person that feels that soul fulfillment inside, so you don't feel empty when you present as this individual person of yourself and I, what you asked about, can that show through? I absolutely believe that it can and, just like you said, you have these intuitive gifts you can feel, if you're you're with a used car salesman and they're not authentic and they're telling you what they need to tell you to sell you this car.
Speaker 2:And for people who are more open to, to their divine calling, I think, is they're more in tune with themselves. When it comes to you know. If you're just doing it to make money, you know if you're doing a job just to make money, people will feel that you know in some capacity and or it'll show in other ways you know, but it will be evident that that that is occurring. But when you're authentic, it's like you know, like you said what, what did you like to do as a child? And you said, oh, I'm starting to roller skate again. That is you being authentically you.
Speaker 1:One last question. I lied. So when you talk about authenticity, is it something that comes from, I mean, you, and I know what it is, but I think people almost have to peel the layers away before they get to their authenticity. Is that true?
Speaker 2:I think it depends, because some people have it there. Have you ever been in a situation where you go on a retreat, or you go on a trip, or you go on a cruise and you're your authentic self? You're dancing, you're, you're doing all the things that you would have done if you weren't in uniform, right? So it's there. It's not that.
Speaker 2:But for some people, yes, depending on their situation, if you've gone through trauma, if you've been in fight or flight mode where you're just so stressed you're all over the place, you have so many things your hands in so many buckets at one time, then, yes, it could be challenging to to know what your authentic self is, but I think a lot of people know. And so there's some people who will go on trips, or they'll go on retreats, or they'll go to these different places and I have a retreat coming up this month, I mean at the end of the week and what people? When you go around, the people who are your tribe. You're your authentic self. So some people do know how to tap into that, but you may need to find that environment that allows you to be your authentic self.
Speaker 1:And be OK with it. You know, some people are afraid to be their authentic self because of what other people might say I just don't care anymore. I mean, I do, but I don't. You know, this is who I am and not everybody. You know, my business coach says not everybody's your flavor and that's okay. So once you, once you say that, you're like oh okay, I'm good. So, Malaysia, this has been such an amazing conversation.
Speaker 2:Where can people find you?
Speaker 1:Where can people find you if they need to contact you?
Speaker 2:So I'm on most social media platforms Instagram, linkedin, tiktok but I have a website. I actually have two websites but wwwmalaysiaharrellcom and also blissfullifeconsultingcom, and so you can reach me on any of those platforms. On social media, it's Malaysia H Harrell. So, yes, just reach out, and, of course, you could Google me as well. Sometimes my business card comes up as well. So, yeah, I'm very accessible.
Speaker 1:Well, I'll make sure those are on the show notes when this airs so that people can go right to your website. But thank you so much for being a guest on Sisters in Service.
Speaker 2:Thank you.
Speaker 1:We're such multi-layered people. We have so many masks that we wear for other people, but there comes a time when you just say I don't want to wear the mask anymore. I just want to be who I am and being authentic and being okay with not everybody liking you. Being who you are, finding out what your, what your inner child wants to do. I still love going to Disney world.
Speaker 2:Yes, I do, and I will shout it from.
Speaker 1:Cinderella's castle.
Speaker 2:That is the biggest part of this is your inner child. That's part of it. Yes, child.
Speaker 1:That's part of it. Yes, it's so important you don't lose that If you've ever watched kids playing okay, and they're just being who they are. If they don't want to do something, you know what they say I don't want to do that, or I'm tired of doing this. Let's play something Very authentic, and we forget how to be that way as we get older. So I will make sure that um Malaysia's information is uh posted when we um, when this goes live, and if you have any questions, reach out to her, cause she's. She sounds amazing. I mean I would hire her, but I'm not sure I need it right now. Maybe I do. Maybe I am crazy and I need some help, but I'm not sure I need it right now. Maybe I do. Maybe I am crazy and I need some help.
Speaker 2:No, it's not that at all.
Speaker 1:It's not that at all. I think people want to feel free honestly, it's unmasking the freedom within themselves.
Speaker 2:And so some people go on retreats you know what I mean and colonels, doctors, they come on the retreats and they need something for themselves. They're used to taking care of everybody else.
Speaker 1:So I love it. So, for all of you listening, please stay safe, take care of each other until next time and please remember that it's never too late to start your impossible. Thank you.